Paris Hilton
Wait, Paris Hilton is a singer now? Word?
When I saw that skinny bish was gonna be in a movie with Elisha Cuthbert, bka Kim Bauer and a Good-Life prospect, I was like, "Wait, Paris is an actress now?" Didn't matter that the flick was warm-garbage, what mattered was that Paris was koppin flick roles. It kinda mystified me, you know, what people saw in her, other than her celebrity, which mystified me even more, you know, her celebrity and how she got it. That sex-tape couldn't have been that much of a q-rating bonanza.
But, I'm thinkin that everybody tries to turn mild to grand celebrity into acting, ya know. Especially in Hollywood. But crossing over to the mic is much harder. Many have failed, as we know. I mean, do yourself a favor and go kop that Eddie Murphy video off youtube.com. An atrocity and blemish on humankind. That's what it was.
As far as Paris goes. I'm thinking there's no way this broad tries to get on the mic and hit some c-flats. it's just not in her cards. Doesn't she know that a wack record can ruin a career much easier than a c-movie can? Her handlers have to know that, right? I'm thinkin this is the case. Yet, I'm on Billboard and I see some ad for her new single. Yep, her new single. My body reacted violently to that news, when I swallowed my coffee, it tasted like a sh**shake. I checked the Hot 100 and see that her single, Stars Are Blind, has been out for 3 weeks, is a respectable No. 30 and even peaked at 18.
So, I had to go check the video. You can imagine my disbelief when the video begins with a pan-shot of a beach shore and a cascading wave and then some soft, yet very cliche, reggae/carribean rythms start seeping out my speakers. It was Paris trying to pull of what Gwen Stefani barely pulls off. I was appalled. But I was also shocked, in a good way. I would've thought Hilton would come out with one of two songs; 1.) a song about other famous white girls hating on her, the media being mean to her and the paparazzi bothering -- all in the name of jealousy; or 2.) some club track that with overtly risque lyrics like, "I lose control when I here this song, come close and punch it in all night long", only they go on TRL and say it's a metaphor for their love of dance and music.
She did neither. Instead, it's just her and a model on the beach and she's singing in a breezy tone to a breezy melody that, here comes a revelation, sounds better than anything Hilarry Duff or Lyndsay Lohan put out. That's not saying much, I know that. But it's saying alot for Hilton. My point is that, I doubt she bombs with this one. I don't see why most of the buying public sheep, people with absolutely no taste for good music and a common-denominator approach, won't be satisfied with songs like that.
If it comes on my radio, I'm turnin it off. If the video comes on, I'm turning it off. But I gotta say, Paris surprised me. I thought she would be woefully bad, like 10 times worse that Hilarry Duff, the way Eddie Murphy was 10 times worse than Milli Vanilli.
True, shame on America for givin this broad such a sweeping artistic forum and niggas like Jeffrey Wright can't get a gig and Bilal can't get Love For Sale (greatest singing album produced since I was born) released. I mean, that's truly despicable. But props to Paris for meeting the low bar.
When I saw that skinny bish was gonna be in a movie with Elisha Cuthbert, bka Kim Bauer and a Good-Life prospect, I was like, "Wait, Paris is an actress now?" Didn't matter that the flick was warm-garbage, what mattered was that Paris was koppin flick roles. It kinda mystified me, you know, what people saw in her, other than her celebrity, which mystified me even more, you know, her celebrity and how she got it. That sex-tape couldn't have been that much of a q-rating bonanza.
But, I'm thinkin that everybody tries to turn mild to grand celebrity into acting, ya know. Especially in Hollywood. But crossing over to the mic is much harder. Many have failed, as we know. I mean, do yourself a favor and go kop that Eddie Murphy video off youtube.com. An atrocity and blemish on humankind. That's what it was.
As far as Paris goes. I'm thinking there's no way this broad tries to get on the mic and hit some c-flats. it's just not in her cards. Doesn't she know that a wack record can ruin a career much easier than a c-movie can? Her handlers have to know that, right? I'm thinkin this is the case. Yet, I'm on Billboard and I see some ad for her new single. Yep, her new single. My body reacted violently to that news, when I swallowed my coffee, it tasted like a sh**shake. I checked the Hot 100 and see that her single, Stars Are Blind, has been out for 3 weeks, is a respectable No. 30 and even peaked at 18.
So, I had to go check the video. You can imagine my disbelief when the video begins with a pan-shot of a beach shore and a cascading wave and then some soft, yet very cliche, reggae/carribean rythms start seeping out my speakers. It was Paris trying to pull of what Gwen Stefani barely pulls off. I was appalled. But I was also shocked, in a good way. I would've thought Hilton would come out with one of two songs; 1.) a song about other famous white girls hating on her, the media being mean to her and the paparazzi bothering -- all in the name of jealousy; or 2.) some club track that with overtly risque lyrics like, "I lose control when I here this song, come close and punch it in all night long", only they go on TRL and say it's a metaphor for their love of dance and music.
She did neither. Instead, it's just her and a model on the beach and she's singing in a breezy tone to a breezy melody that, here comes a revelation, sounds better than anything Hilarry Duff or Lyndsay Lohan put out. That's not saying much, I know that. But it's saying alot for Hilton. My point is that, I doubt she bombs with this one. I don't see why most of the buying public sheep, people with absolutely no taste for good music and a common-denominator approach, won't be satisfied with songs like that.
If it comes on my radio, I'm turnin it off. If the video comes on, I'm turning it off. But I gotta say, Paris surprised me. I thought she would be woefully bad, like 10 times worse that Hilarry Duff, the way Eddie Murphy was 10 times worse than Milli Vanilli.
True, shame on America for givin this broad such a sweeping artistic forum and niggas like Jeffrey Wright can't get a gig and Bilal can't get Love For Sale (greatest singing album produced since I was born) released. I mean, that's truly despicable. But props to Paris for meeting the low bar.
posted by Twistinado @ 2:57 PM
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